Sunday, November 23, 2014

彩排过的人生

27岁即将来到,逐渐觉得青春流逝得太快了。看过的场面多了,经历得多了,很多事情不得不事先彩排,以表现出更完美的结果,或众大欢喜的局面。所有的行动都需三思而后行,所有的言语都需经过深思熟虑才说出口……当生活上每件事都如计划中进行时,人生会变得越来越枯燥无趣。平淡的生活终究不是我所追求的。可是随着责任的增加,岁月的摧残,工作的繁忙,你不能不屈服于平淡带来的舒适和安定。当回过神来,时间已不再等人,我当初向往做的事情呢?过的生活呢?目前已没有多余的精力来进行。那些精力去了哪里?应付老板,应付工作,应付病人,应付家人的期望,应酬朋友,应付虚荣心……

看到邻家小孩嬉闹的笑声,初出茅庐的菜鸟直率的表达方式,顿时会心一笑,他们很天真~ 是青春啊! 这种真情流露,我多久没有经历了?这种不需要经过彩排的言语也一样可带来欢乐,不是吗?一直担心没有彩排会带来的困扰,踏入社会需要准备的面具也越来越多。心理的真情感受都被掩盖起来,只有在独自看电影、夜深人静时,才敢表达出来,这种人生是多么的可悲和无情。我的人生似乎一直在各种各样的期望下挣扎,害怕失败、害怕不成熟、害怕失去、害怕失望……一直在这种恶性循环下紧绷的生活着。久而久之,养成了眷恋夜晚宁静的习惯,那几个小时让自己真情流露的宝贵时间,是让自己反省和净滤身心的短暂时刻。因此,夜晚变得多愁善感、纵泪横流、感触良多的 emo time。隔天踏入医院,又是笑着脸、点着头,尽力做好工作的 mode 了。

领悟了这一点,多交年轻人做朋友,何尝不是件好事?少了扮成熟、扮认真的面具,还多了做自己的轻松。有朋友问过我,“参那班年轻人能学到东西吗?你不是永远吃亏的那个吗?他们只会从你这儿得到好处。” 什么时候连交朋友也要彩排啊?也要计划从他身上可以得到什么好处吗?那你的朋友不是都交大叔大婶吧?我学到怎么活的年轻啊,学到做人不要这么现实啊,学到很多时候不必顾虑人家无谓的眼光啊,学到真情可以随时流露啊,学会珍惜青春啊!20多岁不活泼点,要等50岁吗?生活可以不必活得那么累啊!30岁就要学退休,学做个富太太,学做个老板,学做个上流人,那你这还叫 life 吗?我倒是喜欢充满欢笑声和天真地人生,不断尝试新鲜的东西,偶尔撒个娇、偷个懒,像个小孩般开心的活着。

那是理想的人生。我们目前的人生都充满诱惑:赚大钱、达到事业巅峰,似乎才是被认同的成功人生。我两种人生都想要,可以吗?这样会活得更累、更 bipolar 吧。写到这,人家会说其实你也是因为没有能力过那种上流生活,才推崇这种不成熟的人生吧。那决定权还是看个人。我不想一直活在别人的眼光和期望下,才决定作出这样的选择。找个好事业、找个好男人不是想象中容易啊。不如把人生简单化,事业有多成功不重要,重要是可以帮助别人过得更好、更开心;朋友有没有带给你利益不重要,重要是你能不能帮得到他们,把欢乐带给他们;有没有好男人不重要,重要是有一个能互相真诚对待的伴侣,彼此在一起会过得更开心。

最后,还是要提倡一个人生道理,“助人为快乐之本”。秉持着这个道理,你的人生有没有彩排过,或许都不再重要,因为结果会是开心和无怨无悔的。

Thursday, July 3, 2014

Thursday, February 13, 2014

来认识射手内心的真诚吧!

射手座的人总是固执地认为自己有超乎寻常的承受力,
她将自己想得太坚强,而把别人想得太脆弱。
她老是担心自己的行为会让别人受到伤害。
她不知道,受伤的其实是自己。只是她不知道如何表现出来,
她迷糊得像别人所认为的那样,将自己当成一个百毒不侵的人
常常听到别人说射手很花心,其实射手骨子里是一个对感情极其认真的人,
他们可以爱一个人很久很久,即便是身边常常围绕着许多的异性朋友。
当然最重要的是,和射手座的人在一起很舒服,
因为他们不会强迫你去做某件不情愿做的事情,也常常把顺其自然当作人生的信条。

射手座看起来那么大剌剌的,很难想象是个聪明的人,
其实射手座很两极化,有时很聪明,有时却又像个250傻不隆咚的,
其实这都要看情况,他高兴就跟你好,不开心懒也懒的理人
最让人爱的地方和最让人担心的地方就是天真。虽然具有哲思,
可太过善良和轻易相信别人的性格很容易被人宰割。
认为,世界就是自己看到的那样。黑就是黑,白就是白。想法太直接。
射手是傻人有傻福,无知者无畏,大步的前行,福很容易到。
所以射手必须有人保护或历经沧桑才能立足。
说射手座花心真的很不公平,
说射手喜欢玩感情游戏更是大错特错,
说射手分不清楚友情和爱情简直荒谬。
在他们内心正爱只有一个,一旦爱上,嘴上花,心里却处处为心爱的人着想,
对自己的另一半绝对忠诚,绝对负责!
他们也会给对方同样程度的信任。如果你欺骗他们,那对他们造成的伤害可想而知。
其实射手座女孩都很敏感,看似什么都不计较,不细心,
其实是因为她们在包容你,所以她会假装什么都不知道。
其实射手座女孩都很硬撑,即使一百个委屈,都习惯用自己的方式,独自一人承担;
真正痛苦的时候,其实没人看得见
当你与他相处一周后,你就应该对他的脾气了解得一清二楚了。
直率、开朗、没有心机的他,总是很轻易把他的喜恶表现出来。
他有一种光明,令人感觉生趣盎然的特质,善良而富有同情心。
当他多愁善感的时侯,他需要你温暖的臂膀,而当你沮丧时,他又能感染你的乐观气质。
因为,他是射手座!
其实感情里的射手座,很像一个小孩。
一切都是那么简单,简单到其他人把他们复杂化。
偶尔耍下小脾气故意不回短信,有时又像个大人似的哄到你心花怒放。
这是一个大多数只懂付出不懂获取的星座。
无论怎么样,他依然会设身处地地为人着想,全因在乎你。
请善待每一个射手座。
射手座, 绝对是最有魅力的星座。不太勤奋,可却有过人的智慧,和超强判断力。
射手平常看起来对感情有点花心,可是那是因为射手的认真,对自己感情的负责。
射手不会同时把感情付出给几个人。他只会不断的寻找属于自己的那个。
体贴细心,婚后对感情的专一,也是独具魅力的
射手对恋人正面的批评很反感,甚至是恼怒。
尽管他们自己知道自己做的不妥,有缺点。
并不是不愿意听恋人的劝告,
因为那些批评的语言会让他们觉得对方是在羞辱自己,
这一点射手是决不接受的!
如果对方以一种开玩笑的语气讲他们的缺点,
他们会更乐意接受并且在内心感激恋人的包容
其实射手座的不论男女都很招人喜欢的,
当时还有朋友给我说喜欢射手座的女孩一定不能小心眼儿,
要不吃醋都吃不完呵呵~
不过射手座对待爱情最大的优点就是他/她真心爱上一个人的话会全身心地去爱,

对待爱情很忠贞的,对另一半也很坦诚的。我觉得这应该是射手座的普遍优点吧!

Thursday, January 9, 2014

Bullying...

After so long time since I updated my blog, and still I want to write something serious here -- Bullying. This is not a fresh topic but the act can actually destroy a person's life forever.

When we mention about bullying, we think about school. Yes, this is where bullying starts. All of us hope to make friends and if possible, make friends with those powerful and influential, so that we can live a better social life in school. Make friends with smart students, leader in clubs, head of class, etc. is a norm. We always see those people have a lot of friends. When we think we are one of their friends, we feel safe, proud and happy. Is that true? Let's think about those unlucky ones. When somebody in your class becomes a target of bullying by those powerful 'friends', you laugh with them, call out names.... And the one being bullied has to bear all sorts of 'crimes' that we all created.  Why they become targets? Because they are not pretty enough? Not smart enough? Always sit silently at the edge of classroom? Looked dumb? Not good in speeches? Clumsy in everything? Fine. Any excuses you can find is the reason why. Please bear in your mind - these victims will end up with psychological trauma, and they might never live a happy life anymore. Guess what? They may become the next college shooter? Serial killer? or whatever. 

What about you? You struggle hard to follow the pace of your powerful friend, to stay alive in your circle of friends, so that you won't become the next target. This cycle repeats everyday, in every school, every club, every society, and now in every workplace too...

Can I say Bullying is a kind of Politic? Especially newbies entering a company, we hope to make friends as much as we can with seniors, bosses, colleagues. Socializing skill has become the major skill apart from your core working skill or knowledge. Pity for those not good in socializing, not good in working, being labelled as lazy, stupid, slow. Soon, this label or funny names will spread across the whole department, then the whole company. So, how about ourselves? Can we make sure we are safe forever from these 'politic players'? We also worried, right? We play their games, agree to their laughing stock, follow their trend, to survive - outwit, outplay, outlast!

Most of the time, Bullying has become a Survivor game. We fight hard to stay in the game, avoiding from being voted out from the circle. However, this is also a reality, it happens before our own eyes every day. Do you ever get tired of playing this game? When you stop playing, will you become the next target? Do you ever think of standing out to join those unlucky ones and fight back? It will definitely be a very tough journey.


I want to apologize here, sometimes we might get along to play their games, in order to survive in workplace politics. When I start to realized that, I have to remind myself, stop this immediately, you are here to HELP them not to watch them suffer. We feel happy by helping people all the time, don't we?

In short, to make things easy, why don't we stop bullying, stop playing this game wherever we are? Show some mercy to the unlucky ones, lend them shoulders, do them a favour. Now it's time to let us create harmony and love and make our workplace a better place! =)